Jadiael Tekii remembers the night she thought she had put her children to bed for the last time.
Key points:
- Jadiael Tekii started Project Blokes to help men with their mental health after experiencing depression and anxiety.
- The group aims to reduce stigma and make men feel more comfortable accessing support.
- Lifeline Queensland State Manager Geoffrey Norman says 75 per cent of suicide deaths are men
WARNING: This story contains references to suicide.
It was three years ago, and he planned to end his life the next day.
But a phone call from his partner and then another from a colleague stopped him.
“It got to the point where in my head no one wanted me here anymore and I actually felt like a burden to my own family and children,” Tekii said.
Since then, he has drawn on his experience with depression and anxiety to create Project Blokes, a group in Rockhampton that aims to make men more comfortable talking about their mental health.
Lifeline reports that 75 per cent of people who die by suicide in Australia are men and Mr Tekii wants to improve health outcomes for men.
Project Blokes organizes group walks for men as well as workplace information sessions to raise awareness about mental health and connect people with support.
“We do a fortnightly registry of men … we will have about 10, 14 guys that come on average,” he said.
“We just go around and really go through what was a win and what was a struggle…we want people to share a win and something that they’ve overcome.”
A space to be ‘totally vulnerable’
Nick Grieves first attended a Project Blokes walk after seeing a psychologist through his work, who suggested he seek support from a local group.
“I was going through a difficult stage at work, I was just beginning an apprenticeship in mature age, so I left [earning] about $10 an hour,” he said.
“I was depressed and didn’t feel really manly.
“Going for a walk instead of going to the pub… all the guys there are completely vulnerable.
“There are no beers, no slots in the background, you’re just there to blow off steam and it’s just a safe space.”
Grieves said the group introduced him to coping strategies, like breathwork, and he now volunteers with Project Blokes to help others.
“It’s unreal; it has changed my life,” he said.
Tekii said men often felt pressure to provide for their families, and the group focused on helping men find their identity beyond provision.
She said she also thought that traditional stereotypes of men harmed her mental health.
“This is about reframing and changing the culture of how men should be strong,” he said.
“It’s not really about putting on a façade, it’s about being strong like ‘this is what I’m going through’ and being vulnerable and open when talking about these kinds of things.”
mental health stigma
Lifeline Queensland manager Geoffrey Norman said projects like Mr Tekii’s encouraged conversations about mental health.
“This is a fantastic initiative… it’s a deliberate reason to get together and talk about things, and it doesn’t have to be therapy… but getting together and going out and walking, doing it in a healthy environment is really positive,” said the Mr Norman.
“We know that men are less likely to seek help. There is still a stigma about seeking help, talking about things and actually getting help and support.”
“There are also not as many opportunities or times when men feel comfortable to talk about their worries or concerns.”
Mr. Norman said that if people notice that someone else is struggling, take note of changes in behavior and talk to that person about those observations in a non-confrontational and caring way.
Mr. Tekii said he wanted to share his story so other men would feel less alone.
“We’re the average Aussies who want to help other guys,” he said.
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