Could your teenager be suicidal? Read below to find out

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When a person dies for suicide, becomes sensational news, especially when it comes to a young person. Everyone becomes a kind of investigator and asks questions to put together a narrative that usually includes a lot of blame and accusation: Why did they take this step? What was wrong with the parents and in the family? a love story ends badly? This type of gossip increases the stigma around suicide and mental health issues.

There is no single cause for suicide. Teenagers have often shared difficult situations with me that lead them to think about giving up on life. For example, falling apart in the face of competition, struggling to keep up with pressures at school, meeting expectations of being a “perfect kid” and failing at that, feeling lonely because no one understands you, and repressed emotions of hurt from close relationships . Teenagers also commonly report bullying and alienation from friends. The end result boils down to situations that make them feel like a burden to their loved ones or simply give up hope. Hopelessness (meaning being in a hopeless and hopeless state), is a terrifying space for a young mind.

Suicidal thoughts it could occur in any individual regardless of gender, age, economic status, and achievement. In recent years, we have witnessed famous Tik-Tokers and influencers, and prominent academics giving up on life. Rejection in relationships and from friends, failure at career milestones, inability to make parents proud: such worries engulf them. They struggle to find joy in their lives during these dark times. Negative thinking makes it very difficult for them to imagine a bright outcome for themselves in the future. Hopelessness usually stems from depression. When the intensity of the stress of these situations peaks, some tend to make life-threatening suicidal decisions.

The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention states that depression is the most common condition associated with suicide and often goes undiagnosed and untreated. Conditions like anxiety and substance abuse add to the risk. It would be fair to acknowledge here that the majority of young people who actively sought help for their mental health problems and had family support were able to enjoy their lives in a meaningful way.

The latest data published by the National Crime Registry Office (NCRB) revealed that more than 1.39 lakh Indians committed suicide in 2019, of which 67% were young adults. There are cries for help in most cases. As children move into adolescence and early adulthood, parents find it difficult to know what they are thinking and feeling. It is quite difficult to understand whether a behavior is due to the usual ups and downs of adolescence or is something to worry about.

As their World Suicide Prevention Day On September 10, you, as a parent, can arm yourself with awareness and familiarize yourself with the following warning signs to keep your children safe:
Behaviour:
• Suddenly withdrawn and reserved
• Sudden change of friends
• Difficult to focus
• Give away your possessions
• A sudden drop in academic performance
• Lack of interest in things they normally enjoy

Emotional:
• Sudden mood swings
• Feeling depressed and hopeless
• Appear anxious and stressed
• Higher levels of frustration and agitation
• Loss of self-esteem

Physical:
• Signs of self-harm such as scars on the wrists, thighs and stomach
• Rapid weight loss or gain
• Excessive fatigue

Verbal:
An individual may not repeat “I am suicidal,” but may say it in other ways that allude to it:
• “Nobody would care if I die”
• “Sometimes I wish I could go to sleep and never wake up”
• “I have nothing to look forward to in my life”
• “This is too much for me”
• “You won’t have to worry about me much longer”

Apart from the above, some circumstances tend to place young people in a higher risk category
like below:
• Losing a loved one to suicide
• Conflicts and relationship problems in the family
• Breakup of a relationship
• Has been bullied
• Victims of abuse – sexual or mental
• Mental health condition
• Death of a loved one

Some tips on how to respond if your teen tells you they’re thinking about
suicide:
1. Do not wait in such a situation. Every minute is crucial.
2. Beware of trivializing the subject
3. Give your full attention and listen patiently
4. Let him lead the conversation
5. Be sympathetic and understanding
Show them your love through actions and words. Although you may think it’s obvious, teens need to feel validated during these times. Sometimes all that is needed to help prevent suicide it’s trusting your own instincts and connecting with the person you care about. It’s important to remind your teen of what you’re feeling right now, it won’t always carry so much weight in your life. They need sensitive care. They need hope.
Talk to a psychologist or mental health professional right away, they have the skills to help you and your family through this phase.

There are free telephone help lines to help you in case of distress. Reach:
LifeLine Foundation – 033 40447437 / 9088030303 (10 am to 10 pm, 7 days a week)
Sneha Foundation India – 044-24640050 (10am to 8pm, 7 days a week)
Jeevan Jamshedpur – 9297777499 / 9297777500 (10 am to 6 pm, 7 days a week)

Shubhika Singh is a senior consultant psychologist specializing in young adults; and co-founder of Innerkraft.com based in Calcutta

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