mental health struggles it can sneak up on you, lurking behind a busy life full of responsibilities.
Central Coast NSW mother Tammy Hewitt was involved in the corporate world when she began to feel the “crazy” lifestyle wasn’t making her happy.
“I spent almost 20 years working my way up the corporate ladder. I was available 24/7,” Hewitt, 38, tells 9Honey.
It was during this time that she and her partner Kelvin discovered that they were expecting their first child. While Hewitt waited new parenting to impact how he was living, he underestimated how his life would change.
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Hewitt’s earliest memory of his own childhood was when he was four and a half years old and his little brother died.
“I was only 28 weeks,” he tells 9Honey. “It was something big and he did not understand my pain. I was in pieces and didn’t know how to share what I was going through as it was a difficult time for my family.
“I remember that I didn’t dare to say goodbye to him and I ran out of the hospital and my grandmother and aunt were chasing me,” she continued. “That’s pretty much a pattern I’ve kept my whole life, so crippled by fear and running away.”
Still, life has a way of moving on. Hewitt worked his way through school and then entered the workforce, when corporate life became a blur.
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“I kept suppressing it because I didn’t want to admit that I was unhappy and my mental health was really suffering, and because I was on a high salary, making over $200,000 a year,” she explains.
“Everyone looked up to me because I was rich, successful and traveling the world. Holding on to a job that made me so unhappy made me lose sight of who I was as a person.”
In 2018, Hewitt had recently ended a toxic relationship when she met Kelvin. They welcomed her daughter Indie, now 22 months old.
“I kept suppressing it because I didn’t want to acknowledge that I was unhappy and that my mental health was really suffering.”
“Only once I had Indie did I hit rock bottom. When I went back to work after maternity leave, I was there for two hours and then I left,” she says.
During her maternity leave, Hewitt contracted a severe case of shingles, which kept her bedridden and affected her eyes.
“The worst part was that they separated me from Indie because of the risk of giving him the virus,” he says.
“I stayed in the guest bedroom of the house and I could hear Indie, but I couldn’t hug her. At first, we would make her stand in the doorway so she and I could talk, but we agreed to stop because she would get so upset.” .
Hewitt says he was in no position to help care for his daughter.
“I couldn’t swallow and my anxiety was very intense. I would have constant panic attacks some days and had to take a sleeping pill at night to get any sleep.”
After two days confined to the guest room, Hewitt says she collapsed and spent the next three days crying in despair.
“That’s when the anger and the sadness hit me and the anxiety and I’ve never cried so much in my life,” she says. “Then 8 days later (on day 10 of lockdown), I literally woke up and thought, I want to kick this fear in the butt and the movement was born.
He finally had a chance to stop and think about his life.
“I’ve always been a very strong person and I’ve been through a lot in my life and I just needed a different perspective,” she says.
“It took those 10 days for it to come out of me. It felt almost like an out-of-body experience and I was like, ‘Wait a second. This happened to me, not me.’ Before that, I was in victim mode.”
Reunited with her daughter and well on her way to recovery, Hewitt began planning for her future, which would involve helping others regain control of their mental health.
“When something like my illness happens, you have to acknowledge what happened and why. Just know it’s happening for a reason and you may not know why, but it will come out,” she says.
“Our bodies sometimes force us to have the time and space for this.”
“When something like my illness happens, you have to acknowledge what happened and why.”
Hewitt also sought the support of medical professionals who helped her recover, although the pandemic delayed this part of the process.
“So I thought ‘Okay, I’ll take this on.’ Even in that really vulnerable state of depression and anxiety, I felt emotional freedom.”
As Hewitt embarked on her own recovery, she says her daughter struggled to be apart from her after that short time at the height of her mother’s illness.
“She slept with me from then on and stayed by my side for ten months,” Hewitt says of her daughter Indie, who is almost two years old.
“She moved into her own crib two months ago, but she’s still in our room. Next, we’ll move her into her own room. It’s a process.”
Today, Hewitt’s health is better than it has been in a long time. She trained to become a Certified Life Coach, Human Design Specialist, Mental Health First Responder, ran several online mental health events, created several free support groups, and founded the inaugural national ‘Kick Fear in the Butt’ campaign. , as part of his advocacy organization ‘Mumma Life Is Now’.
The ‘Kick Fear in the Butt’ campaign aims to raise awareness and donations for five national charities: hope bears, Friends with Dignity, friend in me, Gidget Foundation Y ARE YOU OK?
She is also inviting thousands of Australians to join her in ‘100 days of kicking fear in the butt’ by increasing social connections to improve mental well-being, reduce social isolation and disconnection, and most importantly, fear. widespread.
“I still have my moments, but to be honest I feel pretty good. I know I have so many different tools under my belt,” she explains.
The family moved from Sydney to the Central Coast three years ago, and Hewitt finds that meditating and spending time in nature have helped her recover.
“We live near the bush and the beach, overlooking the water. We don’t even have adequate phone coverage. Now I feel blessed because even though I got fired from my job, now I know I’m doing what I’m doing.” want to do every day,” she says.
“I made my car bright yellow and branded. That way I can’t hide. I literally need to fully embody this and show others that fear is good and can propel you forward.”
“It’s important to be as visible to help break down the stigma, to promote conversations about mental health.”
Tammy Hewitt from mom life is now has been named as a finalist for 2022 AusMumpreneur Awards in the ‘One to Watch’ category. This category of awards recognizes individuals who are pre-launch or in their first 12 months, but have a creative, scalable, exciting or innovative business idea or concept.
And she continues to set her sights high. Hewitt hopes her movement can reach more than four million women by the end of 2025 and is on the right track.
If you or someone you know needs help, please contact Lifeline at 13 11 14 or in case of emergency contact Triple Cero (000). For help with postpartum depression, contact PANDA at 1300 726 306.
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