No, You Don’t Know Anything About My Fitness Just by Looking at My Body

WWalking into SoulCycle as a fat woman was one of the most alienating experiences of my life. Despite the lovely lemon-scented candles and peppy people, my friend and I found that we were not only the biggest bodied people in the class (this was over 100 pounds ago for me), but certainly the two who seemed most lost. .

We were barely acknowledged at the desk and left alone as we went inside. As the lights dimmed and the skinny instructor yelled, “THIS IS YOUR FAMILY” in a dark, tech-laden room, we were completely left behind. No one defined hand positions, acclimated us to gear shifting levers, or offered help setting up our bikes. It was unwelcoming and unpleasant. It took me years and a lot of persuasion before I tried another kind of cycling. (I love it now, thanks to friends who showed me a different way.)

If I’m not being ignored in a fat body when I walk into a gym, I’m being patronized or ridiculed. I have heard it all; a whisper at the front desk of “this is a challenging class, so feel free to stay in child’s pose,” or an instructor loudly declaring from the podium “you’re so inspiring to come today” with laser focus in my belly.

And no, they don’t tell everyone. It is very clear to me that my body size often makes fitness professionals uncomfortable. Your industry has been built on “looking good” according to some ideal, so why not?

It is very clear to me that my body size often makes fitness professionals uncomfortable.

Even studios that tout inclusivity often celebrate a specific type of aesthetic. I was once a dance fitness instructor at an inclusion-based company. It was my favorite thing I’ve done to date. However, the CEO once told me not to do being a big girl “my brand” so that I am not pigeonholed into one type of thing. Meanwhile, all the other instructors were told to find their unique voice and encouraged to develop it via social media.

Fat bodies are seen as the enemy of fitness, something that needs to be resolved. Food is combustible or evil or must be carefully controlled, not enjoyable or full of culture. How sad is that? What could happen in our studios and gyms if embraced the idea to move our bodies for joy, endorphins, health and fun?

I love to dance. I love good music in a spin studio. I’ve even come to enjoy a hot yoga class (but please give me more yin for these aching bones). I’m a runner. I love picking up and putting down heavy things. When a fitness community is good, it’s so, so good, full of people who encourage each other and challenge each other to do hard things.

I recently ran/walked my first 5K. It was the weekend of my 37th birthday, and I had been training for what seemed like forever. I hired an amazing trainer who gave me a training plan and responsibility, but also reminded me that injury and life were going to happen. I have a running team (come visit us on Tuesday nights—Nameless is the first black-led running group in Boston) which was a consistent group of cheerleaders. My friend and ultratrail marathoner, Julia, drove over 50 miles to be my famous woman while I ran through the streets of Ipswich, Massachusetts. This is the fitness community that everybody deserve.

So how could the rest of the industry be more similar?

Start by offering variations for people with bodies of all sizes. Encourage people to do what feels good to them. Sure, we go to a training for a challenge, but everyone gets injured, skinny or fat, and guides us to push ourselves No danger it’s a great way to make sure you’re taking care of your customers.

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And when you do a merchandising run, don’t work with brands that are exclusive (spoiler alert, XL is not an enlarged size). Consider that some brands have a serious history of fatphobia, and are only now starting to expand their sizes because it’s all the rage. Also consider the stability of your equipment for larger bodies.

No, you don’t know what my body can do just by looking at it. When I enter your studio, greet me as you would any paying customer. A smile and a welcome is great. If this is my first time, ask if I’d like you to help me find the bathrooms or get settled. Don’t make assumptions about what I can or can’t do, or try to inform me. Sounds like what you would do for anyone, right?

I love to move. My fat friends too. We deserve studios where we can feel accepted, included, even celebrated. It’s a joy to see the old big-bodied alienation of fitness cracking a bit, with the rise of amazing women like jessamyn stanley, ash pryorY Lizzo’s Big GirlsLook how these athletes move! Keep in mind that they are confident in their abilities, just like you. Support us, hire us, let us represent all types of bodies for your brands. Let’s find our joy and you’ll see what we can do.

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