This article contains a discussion of suicidal ideation.
In a recent interview with Zane Lowe on Apple MusicNoah opened up about his past struggle with Xanax addiction and how it affected his mental health.
Noah explained that he decided to “kick off” his addiction to “quiet, prescription pills, [and] painkillers” in December 2020.
“Xanax – that was my drug of choice,” she said, “and I was completely wrapped up in that drug.”
Noah said he finally “asked for help” after feeling like he “just lost all hope and faith.” “For so long he had been denying, denying, denying and walking away,” he explained, “where I finally said, ‘I can’t lie to you anymore.'”
“I called my therapist, I called my psychiatrist, and I think there was a lot of confusion that a lot of things fell into place for them, where a lot of stories didn’t make sense in the past.”
“I got the help that I needed and also the help that I deserve, and that every person with addiction or mental health deserves.”
Noah also talked about the “personal things” he had to “accept” after receiving help dealing with his addiction.
“I’ve recognized it and I’m definitely curing it,” he said. “But I also think that, at that point, I didn’t want to be alive anymore. I didn’t want to.”
“And I was just waiting for a day where maybe I wouldn’t wake up. I don’t know where it was going. There were a lot of scary moments.”
“I just know that I was trying to avoid being alive or maybe feeling the feeling of being alive. Because sometimes being alive is painful.”
Noah also talked about how taking care of his dogs helps with his mental health and how he feels in recovery.
“Either it’s the first time or the first time in a long time,” she said, “that I’ve felt this feeling in myself of peaceful happiness.”
listen to the whole interview here.
the National Alliance on Mental Illness the helpline is 1-888-950-6264 (NAMI) and provides information and referral services; goodtherapy.org is an association of mental health professionals from more than 25 countries that supports efforts to reduce harm in therapy.
If you or someone you know is struggling with substance abuse, you can call SAMHSA’s national helpline at 1-800-662-HELP (4357) and find more resources. here.
