Men are more at risk of mental illness post-breakup, study finds | Globalnews.ca

When Roman Mironov’s marriage ended seven years ago, he was devastated.

“It was totally devastating because I actually expected my marriage to last forever,” the now 39-year-old woman told Global News.

“I felt like that was the end of my life, for the first few weeks,” he said, noting that he suffered from mild depression. “I felt terrible and just didn’t know what to do.”

Mironov’s feelings are not isolated.

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Coping Amid COVID-19: The Toll of Mental Health on Canadian Men

TO recent study from the University of British Columbia Commissioned by the charity Movember, it found that when men leave a relationship, they are at increased risk of mental illness, including anxiety, depression and even suicide.

John Oliffe, the paper’s lead author, noted that marital separation quadruples the risk of male suicide.

“If we think about suicide prevention and we know that men (commit) suicide three to four times more than women, I think it’s a given that relationship breakups put them at risk,” said Oliffe, chair of research at Canada and UBC. nursing professor.

The researchers interviewed 47 men from Canada and Australia and asked them about their experiences with their breakups. 96 percent shared detailed accounts of “anxiety, depression, and suicidality” both during and after the failed relationship. They found that when faced with conflict, men downplayed the issues, causing the relationship to fracture even more.

“I think especially in breakups, there’s regret for what happened… for what could have been better,” Oliffe said.

Oliffe also said there is stress and anxiety about what someone’s future will look like as a single person.

The study also found that those facing a post-breakup mental struggle tended to use substances, including alcohol, to cope with their feelings.

And this situation has become even more serious, thanks to the COVID-19 pandemic and the isolation it caused.

Ottawa psychotherapist Sean Hale isn’t surprised by the findings.

“Guys I’ve worked with a lot of times, they’re not socialized to talk about emotions,” Hale said.

He explained that the pandemic left many struggling to maintain social connections. In turn, men have lost contact with friends and, when a breakup occurs, they have no one to turn to.

“When a relationship ends … if you feel these emotions and you can’t get them out, it can lead to those kinds of depressed feelings because you’re dealing with it on your own,” Hale said.

Oliffe said the study found that men used resources to address their mental health after a breakup, but said they need to be given ways to communicate, cope and express their feelings with an intimate partner.

Mironov, who said he is now in a thriving relationship, uses his post-breakup experience to help others as a relationship coach.

He said that men shouldn’t have to suppress their emotions.

“I would say… contact someone. … It can be a friend, it can be a therapist. You have to believe in yourself,” Mironov said.

“You have to realize that just by taking small actions, going out, socializing, dating, you will get out of that state.”