Let’s face it, we all feel angry at different times for different reasons. You could be angry with a person you don’t like, when you experience unfair treatment or if you have some unmet needs; For many, listening to criticism is irritating, while others get angry about getting stuck in traffic or having a delayed flight. Often brooding over traumatic memories or feeling anxious about future events can make us angry. Therefore, anger can be caused by both internal and external events. Ms. Samar, a psychologist, holistic health coach, and CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) expert, is here to share her insights into understanding the causes of anger and its detrimental repercussions on physical and mental health.
Negative effects on physical and mental health: Anger hinders reason and logic. It clouds judgment and emotional intelligence. The worst part is the regret and remorse, just think how many times have you regretted the things you said when you were angry? Knowing that there’s nothing you can do about it now? Anger traps you in a cycle of regret that is hard to break.
Also, frequent outbursts of anger can affect your health. Chronic anger makes one susceptible to high blood, cardiovascular disease (anger is known to constrict blood vessels and increase clotting, triggering a heart attack). Being angry doubled the risk of cardiac arrest in people who already had heart problems. Also, the constant outpouring of stress hormones like ‘cortisol’ and ‘adrenaline’ excites the sympathetic nervous system which suppresses the immune system and triggers tension headaches.
In addition, your mental health is also affected, increasing your risk of depression, isolation, anxiety, insomnia, chronic stress, and even suicidal thoughts and attempts. And she also undermines relationships at home and in the workplace.
ways to make a change
- Willingness to change for the better: “Nothing is easy for those who do not want to”. The willingness to accept that you feel angry most of the time and understand its impact on quality of life is a crucial step. The will allows us to see new possibilities. Make a commitment to improve, this will empower you, bringing strength and determination to make better changes in yourself. Without successfully completing this step, the steps mentioned below will be of little or no use.
- ‘Be aware’ of your anger triggers: Try keeping a record of your recurring angry thoughts, images, or memories in a journal, name it “Angry Thought Tracking Log.” For example, he may have various thoughts when faced with criticism from his boss, at home, while stuck in traffic, or in an unhappy relationship. Write down as many angry thoughts/memories as you can on a regular basis and also use a 10-point scale to rate how angry you are with each thought, with 10 being the highest. Knowing the relationship between thoughts, emotions, and behaviors will help you understand how anger works and shed light on the ‘why’ aspect of your anger.
- speak it objectively with a trusted friend or family member whom you respect and love: Suggestions from people you respect and value can make a big difference. Most of the time there is an underlying negative emotion like sadness, disappointment, dissatisfaction, frustration, embarrassment, guilt, hate, etc., which can be the reasons behind your anger.
- Avoid the blame game: Indulging in blame games gets us nowhere near a solution, in fact, it makes the problem at hand worse. Some of the benefits of avoiding blame games are that it makes one more productive and effective in solving problems, increases focus and clarity, aids in learning, allows you to take responsibility for your actions and words. It also saves a lot of energy and time.
- Full attention: In addition to being informed about your train of thought, recognizing physiological changes in response to anger can be very helpful. Find a seat if you can, take 2-5 minutes to notice your breathing, heart rate, see if your fists and jaws are clenched, or if there are any unpleasant sensations in your stomach, chest, or face. Continue to stay with the sensations as long as possible. Avoid using the words “never”, “should” or “must”, these words only add to the pressure.
The best way is to ask yourself some mindful questions like ‘why am I getting angry?’ What was I thinking a moment ago? Why does my body react this way? Is my anger masking or hiding other negative emotions like frustration, embarrassment, hurt, embarrassment, insecurity, sadness, anxiety? What can I do to be calm and happy at this time? How can I be nicer? These questions will give you important clues about why you got angry and how to deal with it.
Also read: 5 surprising health benefits of a good night’s sleep
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