Have you ever started a workout routine only to think, “What’s the point?”
The cycle of throwing your hat in the ring before trying well is what’s often referred to as a “defeat mentality,” and it’s not just you, professional athletes also suffer from it.
So what do you do on those days when you just can’t find the motivation to get moving?
I spoke with personal trainer and fitness instructor Megan Waters and sports psychologist Emma Slade to get their advice.
It is helpful to first understand its relationship to exercise.
A self-defeating mindset is what sports psychologist Emma Slade describes as “thoughts, behaviors, and feelings” that make us feel like our ultimate goal is impossible.
We’re not born with this attitude—internal and external factors help shape this mindset, including our experience with exercise growing up.
“We all have our own lived experience with exercise… If you’ve had a really positive experience around sport and movement, then you’re more likely to look [out] those opportunities,” says Ms. Slade.
Negative experiences can also leave a lasting impact.
“A common example is in high school PE class where the language or behaviors of others made it a really negative experience where you walked away feeling embarrassed or embarrassed,” says the Queensland psychologist.
“With exercise, there is a great link to our body, our ability to move and our body image.”
We see thousands of ads every day and scroll through social media for perfect photos, which can raise doubts in our mind.
“People compare themselves and often think, ‘To go to this group gym, do I need to be X, Y and Z or do I need to use [certain] clothes and I don’t have those things’, so before you start, exercise [feels] difficult,” says Ms. Slade.
That’s not to say we can’t rewrite the narrative, but it can be difficult.
Where do you start?
To feel “motivated and really fulfilled,” Emma says our goals need to check three boxes: having autonomy, feeling competent, and being able to connect with other people.
Autonomy is about having options, so if you’re just getting back into exercise, you might try different activities or shop around at different gyms until you find the one that’s right for you.
It’s also about having the option to go at your own pace, especially if you’re comparing your progress to previous versions of yourself or other people.
“Us [like] routine and order and often I apply it to exercise and I hope it is linear, but our relationship with exercise is very irregular and [we need] have more acceptance around that,” says Ms. Slade.
Remember, feeling unmotivated is not necessarily a bad thing
Listening to your body is not only necessary for recovery, it’s completely normal when you’re trying to change.
Megan Waters, a Melbourne-based personal trainer and fitness instructor, says it’s about starting simple.
“It’s just a case of starting somewhere, it could be as simple as stretching at home and allocating time to move your body for five to 15 minutes. [and taking] small steps to start,” says the Warumungu/Yawuru Melbourne coach.
“Instead of pressing [yourself] at the gym, if the sun is shining, go for a walk and get back into a routine, and talk kindly to yourself, I’m a big believer in positive affirmations.”
Leaving the house and going outside to exercise is arguably one of the hardest steps, especially if you don’t feel like it.
But what do you do when you arrive and still don’t feel like exercising?
“Maintaining the routine of getting up and going to the gym provides a feedback loop in your brain, which you’re rewiring every time you go,” says Ms Slade.
“But you can also show up and say, ‘I’m only going to be 50 percent today and that’s fine.'”
finding your community
Being active with like-minded people will not only keep you accountable, it can also help keep you motivated by creating a connection and feeling part of a larger community.
“If we connect with people that we relate to or can relate to in other things, [like] training with other moms who have children under five, we may not relate to exercise, but we can relate to the fact that we are in a similar stage of life,” says Ms. Slade.
Making friends as an adult can be a challengebut that’s where group fitness classes can help, says Megan.
“[I’ve seen] A lot of people come here who haven’t worked out before and fall in love with the group fitness environment — the positive energy and fun atmosphere that group classes can create,” she says.
Review your goals to ensure they are ‘process driven’
Results-focused goals, like wanting to change your appearance, can be the perfect breeding ground for a self-defeating attitude, as they often evoke high expectations.
“When we have an outcome goal, it’s usually just a little bit motivating,” says Ms. Slade.
“Because [your goal] it’s so far along that there’s more time for things to get in the way.”
On the other hand, ‘process-based goals’ focus on the little things you can do each day or week to contribute to your larger goal, like walking three or four times a week if your ultimate goal is start running.
Seeing small results increases your confidence to keep going.
“It’s about the process and how it makes you feel,” says Slade.
“Even if we don’t actually get the result, we’re not worse off: our health has probably improved, as have other biomarkers, like your mental health.”
Set aside time to reflect
Carving out time for yourself ahead of time also helps you meet your goals.
“Scheduling on time is going to be more beneficial than just going on a whim. [Block out time] in your journal or calendar to get moving in some way,” says Ms. Waters.
She says it’s also important to take care of your mind just as much as it is to take care of your body to address those self-limiting thoughts.
“Writing in a journal about how you’re feeling or what you want to achieve takes it out of your mind, puts it on a piece of paper, and it’s a really good way to process things,” she says.
“Write a list of five things you love about yourself that make you the legend you are, and refer to it when you have those mental lapses.”
“[Keep] keep it on your phone or carry it in your wallet and read it when you feel like it’s not good enough,” says Ms. Waters.
This is general information only. For personal advice, you should consult a qualified doctor.
Learn more and get inspired by visiting the Your Move collections at abc view Y abc listenincluding exercise playlists classic abc Y double Jor take the ABC Health Check quiz at abc.net.au/yourmove.
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Aware 4 hours ago4 hours agoTue 25 Oct 2022 at 19:00, updated 18 hours ago18 hours agoTue Oct 25, 2022 at 4:59 am
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